Winter Time Is Here

Winter time is upon us now. Regrettably so, as it is my least favorite season. My house got 9 inches earlier this week! And before Halloween? It should be a crime. As the muppets put it… it chills me to the bone. So much so, that my personal heater for some years now has become my blow dryer. It is the perfect portable heater, but what I really want is one of those hair salon blow dryers… you know the ones you can sit under. (Um Santa please take note on this one)

That’d be the day! I’m always talking about how when I finish school I’m moving to Canada… and my family just laughs. If I can barely handle Utah cold how could I handle Canada cold! They are right, I’d probably be found frozen mid-stride on my way to a maple fest or something. Anyways I’m getting beside the point.

Every time I open the door to my apartment to brave the cold I feel like I am stepping into a giant walk in freezer. It is just horrible. Winter is like being on the frozen isle of grocery but for FIVE + months! I brought this topic up in conversation with my dad the other day. I asked him out of jest if he though people lived longer in colder climates, in the same sense that food in better preserved in the freezer. His response was, “well I don’t know, there are an awful lot of old people living in Arizona and Florida.” I love my dad.

Two pairs of socks, uggs, underarmor, two pairs of sweatpants (or stretchy pants if its a good day), undershirt, t shirt, sweatshirt, beenie on, sweatshirt hoodie up, ski coat, ski coat hood up, mittens, and a scarf and I’m good to go. I won’t blame you if you don’t wave to me on my way to campus, you probably won’t recognize me.

At least its almost Christmas Yay! Oh ya, word on the street is that another epic dessert party like last years Valentines Extravaganza (only this time Christmified to the max) is being schemed by a Miss Abby W. no make that A. Wheatley. Ps. on November 1st Christmas music will be making an ultimate comeback in my life!

Guilty Pleasure #7: Free Samples!

Free samples are simple stated one of life’s many joys. I live for them. When I lived in Florida I certainly thrived and survived at times off of them. I must say that now I have toned down my constant need and abuse of free samples, but that doesn’t mean that it is any less fun.

Where do I sample?

Costco, Sams Club, Target, Great Harvest, Sees, food courts, Le Gourmet Chef, Harry and David, Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory, frozen yogurt places, The Sweet Tooth Fairy, Sunflower Market, Good Earth Grocery Stores, the BYU career fair, and the BYU housing fair. The BYU housing fair was the best sampling session I have ever been apart of. They are throwing doughnuts, cookies, popcorn, tacos, ice cream bars, candy bars, and coconut macaroons practically in your face. If you are looking for a good time in January you’re so invited to come to the housing fair with yours truly.

There is something about free food that is just so satisfying. Sampling is ideal because I get to eat a small portion of foods that I normally don’t buy for my belt buckles sake and I feel guilt free. Most impressive free samples from Costco have been: a quarter piece of a hamburger, hot cinnamon rolls, whole creamies, sushi, full size maple leaf shaped cookies, and bagels. Sampling tip: go right before a big holiday weekend! Costco pulls out all the stops!

Oh and case you were wondering all Costco’s sample the same food on the same day. Its been tested. Lets just say that I know the sample people at Orem’s Costco and they recognize me. I don’t abuse the system I just utilize it while I am there. Who can say no to a free sample?

Now if you wanted to be dishonest you could eat every day for free on BYU’s campus by going to the countless lectures held every day that are catered with pizza, veggies, and fruit afterward. I don’t and have never done that… but it is actually a pretty good idea.

Beginners Guide to Dating in P Town

So in case you didn't know... Provo is statistically one of the top dating towns in America. (did you know that 60% of statistics are made up on the spot? go figure) There is a science to this so called "P Town" dating. Its more complicated than you might think, and it goes a little something like this...

1. The meet cute. When two people meet for the first time and find some common ground/interest. If the boy is interested we move to step 2.

2. Guy calls girl and and asks her for a group/double date on the weekend. There is some minimal mid week texting involved until they go on the date. Then of course there is the always forever awkward post date hug. Which leads to the next step...

3. The PDT. PDT= Post Date Text (creatively acronymed by my awesome roommate Liz). If the guy really likes the girl he'll text her as soon as the date is over. He'll usually say something like... I had a great time! Thanks! You looked really pretty tonight.... ( multiple girls have gotten this exact same text which shows its a universal male PDT)... which I always find interesting since they were the one who paid for me and I should be thanking them but whatevs I guess. Oh and ps. if you thought I looked pretty you should've told me in person you would've scored big time brownie points! And made the girl blush to boot. If the girl really likes the guy she'll beat him to the PDT. And if she isn't into the guy she probably won't even send one. But don't worry fellas, she may just be unaware of the PDT, so don't loose all hope. For all of you who dated before texting was a big thing, you're probably thinking this sounds ridiculous... but no this is really just how it is.

4. If both parties are interested they'll get together for a small date (aka a walk, frozen yogurt run, study sesh in the library, or walk home from campus together) mid-week relatively soon after their date.

5. Then this will lead to date #2. Possibly a single date or another group date. If date number two goes well, more texting, library time, and movie watching is done... yada yada yada you know where I'm going with this.

These beginning stages are exactly the same every stinking time. I am the first person to say that I hate texting. Boys and girls lets just be adults and call one another! It is so much easier and there is no confusion ( just youtube "boys will be girls" and "boys will be girls: girls night out" and you'll know what I'm talking about- hilarious stuff). Boys let girls know what the plan is. Girls do not like surprise activities on dates! We need to plan our shoes accordingly yo.

So what if you want to get out of this five step process smoothly but the person is just not getting the message. You can't! The girl or guy who wants to escape will inevitably end up being a jerk trying to get out of it. Guys always tell me that they would appreciate a girl who would say to them "thanks but I'm just not interested" so that they don't keep wasting their time or money. But we all know that no one wants to hear "thanks but I'm not interested". haha My sweet mom makes me laugh so hard. She told me the other day that she once said that same sort of thing very kindly to a guy in college. And what did he do? He went home and told all of his roommates what a jerk she was and word spread like wildfire. She never told a guy she wasn't interested again.

So basically since hardly anyone says it like it is anymore. Here's how you tell if someone is not interested

- They let voicemail answer your phone calls.

- Don't respond to your texts until hrs later

- Keep saying no to dates without giving alternate times/days

- Avoid you in places where you usually see one another.

If someone likes you, they'll be all up in your facebook, texts, move their schedule around to make time for you, and seek you out to talk to you in a public setting.

If this ain't happinen then "it" ain't happinen.

Just tellin it like it is as always

So lately I am realizing just how non-athletic I am, and I must say... it is quite annoying. And in college, sports participation cannot be avoided no matter what you do... believe me I've tried. Sports are not my cup of tea. I'm the girl who wore her leg brace longer than needed to high school just to avoid the basketball section of gym class. Volleyball? I'll pass. Golf? Highest score award (ps. that's not a good thing). Skiing? The Bunny Hill and I have a good time. Ultimate Frisbee? Are you kidding. Softball? It's manageable. Swimming? Does having underwater tea parties count? The saddest part is that I recently discovered the so called friendly playground games of four square and kickball are also added to my "Abby cannot play" list. And to make matters even worse... two weeks ago I found out that I couldn't ride a bike. DUN DUN DUN...... I know... its pretty bad. Sure I may have played lacrosse in high school but really... I just played so I could wear this cute outfit and tie a ribbon in my hair.

No. 4.... check it

I think it all comes down to reflexes and coordination... I have neither. I'm a champ at aerobics and step, just pumped out a half marathon, and really love working up a good sweat. Sports just aren't my fort-ay. Hiking sounds like a really good hobby for me to pick up. No coordination required. Now... i just need to make friends with people who like to hike so I can make it to the top of Provo's very own pride rock. Oh and wait 6 months for good weather again. Why do these realizations always come too late?

strange facebook and breast cancer collaberation?

So last year it was posting your bra color as your facebook status to raise awareness for breast cancer and this year it is where you put your purse. Not only do these status's sound dirty but after my previous post titled "gross" you realize just how dirty your friends are! haha Alot of people I know have there status set as I like it on the table/counter/couch.... ummm.... all I can say is that I won't be eating dinner at their apartment anytime soon. Gross!!!

College

So a lot of the time I wonder what I am really doing in college. In most of my classes I feel that I learn nothing, am given endless amounts of reading, ridiculous finals, and take dinky attendance quizzes that fill in the gaps.

Today, however, for the first time in 2 years I had a profound moment. I have this amazing professor who actually knows how to hold the attention of the class. Besides the fact that he doesn't use boring power points, utilize blackboard whatsoever, or give any tests/finals he still manges to keep the attendance and attention of his students. We come to class having read the text we discuss it for two or three days then take a simple 10 question quiz and the conglomerate quiz scores comprise our grade. Isn't that what school should be? I feel like it has gotten so technical lately that many teachers can't even function with out a power point.

Back to my profound moment.

We were having a discussion on urban vs. rural areas and folk vs. pop societies. My professor told us to imagine that we'd broken both of our legs and we are lying in the hospital bed. He asked us (without posting in a facebook status that you'd just broke both your legs or sending endless texts to multiple people) you how many people would know that this happened to you? How many people would actually stop what they were doing to come and see you in the hospital?

The interesting part of our discussion is that besides family, not many people would come. We live in such a removed society that people wouldn't even be aware for quite some time as to what happened to you, and if they did know most likely they'd give their schedule the priority and wouldn't want to take the 20 minute drive to the hospital just to visit you. Sure a person may have 700+ facebook friends but what does that even mean? Is it a competition of who knows the most people. In urban societies we have more relationships but less attachment. People who live in pop culture societies tend to feel lonely a lot because while they may have all the facebook friends in the world... how many of their so called "friends" truly care for them.

We compared this scenario to a rural environment. If you broke both your legs your whole town would know. Everyone including your teacher and their dog would be visiting you in the hospital.

So here comes my profound realization. I hate our modern technology and how it has distanced us from what really matters. I can't stand it when people are glued to their iphones 24/7. Like they can't go 5 minutes sitting/waiting in silence just pondering, soaking in their environment, or actually holding a real conversation with a real person.

Facebook, has its good and bad sides but I know it has altered the way that I interact with people for the worse. I hardly ever call my old friends from high school because its just easier to facebook them. I also feel like there is quite the competition to see who has the busiest schedule, and not just necessarily on facebook. I used to feel that if every moment wasn't filled with some sort of scheduled activity or plan I was wasting time. Or that if I sat in my apartment for even two hours with nothing to do I was missing out on some huge party. Whatever happened to free time? We even schedule our fun now, sometimes even weekends in advance. For a long time now I have never felt pressure to have pre-made plans for the weekend. Whatever happens happens. I get annoyed with people who are always looking for a party or the next best thing. Just be happy with where you are and make your own party. My wise sister Katherine taught me that long ago, and I think we have way more fun than those people who drive and hop around to different parties looking for their so called version of a good time. Lame! Lame! Lame!

I'd always thought that I wanted to live in a large city someday but I think I'm changing my mind. We are here on earth for a reason... to experience it! Not live vicariously through electronic devices and search for the next best thing. Maybe living out in the middle of nowhere isn't as bad as it seems. Everything is so much simpler there. Am I the only technophobe that blogs? haha Probably.

Wow, this may be one of my longest rants ever.... sorry :) Peace & Blessings ya'll

Gross

Two posts in one day!!! I must have a lot to say.... that or my class that I am sitting in (ahem..... family processes) is excruciatingly boring.

I have had this thought lately almost every time that I use a public bathroom. Just hear me out. You enter the bathroom, sometimes there is a hook on the back of the door but more often than not, the hook is gone or one

never existed in the first place.

So where does your armadillo purse

Chewy backpack

or Joey man bag go?

On the ground. Do you know how gross that is? How many times have you walked past a stall where the floor was mysteriously wet and covered in toilet paper. Just nasty. And still.... every time we go to the bathroom we sit our backpack/ personal items on the floor.

It gets better

Then when you get home you either sit your purse on the kitchen counter, your backpack on your bed or couch. So that means you are eating more than just your food for dinner. Dinner plus thousands of bacteria!!!! Oh and next time you go to lay down on the couch for a Sunday nap I wouldn't let your mouth drool all over the fabric, you pick up more than just slime on the side of your face. How about E COLI and Hepatitis!!!! Yippee Hooray!!!!

I hope I have sufficiently scared you all.

What's the solution to this problem: disposable backpacks

I know I'm a genius. Dad how about we jump on this invention!

It's Library Time

It's library..... It's library ---Ti iime!!!!

Thank you to flight of the concords.

Well I'm back in the library for the first time this semester and just about as annoyed as ever. Not only have I seen just about every creature I remember avoiding last semester but a whole new crew. I must say I think this will be my last time up here on the fifth floor. The dynamics of this floor, though while hilarious... are slowing driving me mad. The volume is quite low today surprisingly but this place is truly an exclusive club. If your dad doesn't own a Bentley you may as well have grown up in a cardboard box.

One thing about todays particular visit... there are far too many bird nest sized headbands and too many baggy beanies atop heads. Its like 75 degrees outside people. Come on now. Farewell fifth floor. You've driven me to insanity.